Tuesday, March 30th

We are now at 60 days on Reconcile. Something is changing in Toby. Although seemingly small things they are huge to us.

The last few days, Toby is eating his breakfast, in the kitchen without me there. Normally, Ken would have to move Toby's bowl to Toby's room to get him to eat. He would try it in the kitchen, but no eating for Toby there. This morning Ken put Toby's bowl down - not where I normally put it by the door. Toby kept going up to Ken and just looked at him as if he was trying to say something. After a couple times, Ken moved Toby's bowl to the spot I use and Toby ate his breakfast!!!! It was as if Toby decided he would eat, in the kitchen with Ken there - IF - it was in the right spot.

In the mornings, Toby does his run upstairs to greet me and will follow me down when I'm done doing my morning routine. Monday, when I went downstairs, Toby did not follow me. He fell asleep and when he woke up, must have decided it was okay to stay up there with Ken. This morning, Toby did the same thing, did not follow me downstairs. Instead, when Ken went to the bathroom to take his shower, Toby followed him and layed by the door until he was done. It's odd that all of a sudden, it's okay for Toby to be around Ken. Going for walks at night is now 'their' routine, doing the Daddy's Home happy dance is 'their' routine. Toby now runs to the window that faces the driveway to watch Ken come in, just like Buddy.

Maybe it's going to be a process of elimination for Toby. One by one he'll analyze the people in our lives and when he feels a trust, will accept them.

Friday, March 26th

Update: Toby is taking his Reconcile (Prozac) daily. We haven't used the Xanax because no one was visiting this week. Robin was here on Tuesday for a couple hours while I was out and Toby wandered around the house with ease. He would not take any 'high value' treats from her though, until I came home. I'm training him to go on a long lead, reinforced with hot dog discs (his fave) so Robin can use it if she needs to let him out.

This has been a week of subtle changes for the better. Toby is actually happy, and animated when Ken wants to walk he and Buddy. Instead lowering his tail when the leashes come out, he is now jumping around in a little happy dance. When Ken comes home and I do the singsong 'Daddy's home, Daddy's home' - he runs to the door with Buddy and will stay to get a pat on the head. At dinner time, he will eat his whole meal, by the door, IN the kitchen, with Ken sitting there. All of these things are just becoming the routine for Toby.

I still notice a sense of calm when I put on a new DAP collar.

We had one incident. On one of our warmer days I had the door to the patio open with just the slide away screen door on it. Toby did not see the screen and ran into it. The door opened with a big noise and he ran wildly outside. Coming back in that door, which is the door to 'his' room became off limits. Of course I thought it was going to set us back. But, with coaxing with hot dog treats got him to use that door within a few hours - as opposed to a few days.

I've tried the DAP spray in the car, but it doesn't seem to make much difference - but we're not giving up.

Toby still has times when he acts startled at noises, but he's not as reactive. In the past he would run for his room and now he'll just stop in his tracks and look around. This evening on his walk, he noticed the bright moon in the sky and kept looking at it. He also watches jets fly overhead sometimes. I've only had one other dog that did that.

I'm starting to feel like some of our hurdles have quietly gone away. Still more to overcome, but not so overwhelming.

Sunday, March 14th

This was a 'good' week for Toby for the most part. He had a day at the spa and that was probably the most stress for him - that he reacted to.

I did give him a Xanax and sprayed to car seat with DAP. When I got the leashes out for all the dogs, he was all bouncy and excited to go 'somewhere'. Toby did fine throughout the whole bathing and grooming until it was time to do his front feet. That is when he started mouthing the groomer to get her to stop. I gave her permission to use a soft muzzle if she felt his discomfort was escalating. She did use it one time and he was fine with her for the rest of his trim. The groomer said Toby is definitely more confident and not the shy dog he was. She described it as being more of a pushy Airedale.

When people come in and out of our home, Toby is now coming to the door with me. Interesting observation: If I answer the door, he's fine. He seems to have more comfort when people come in our front door and even will come up and sniff them without his tail tucked. If someone comes to our back door and lets themselves in, he will start barking. Good news, when Ken comes home, he comes through the door from our garage, and Toby is now joining Buddy to welcome him home! He'll pause to make sure it's Ken, but his tail stays up. There is a sense that Toby is settling in to our home routines. If Toby was thirsty, he'd go to the water bowl and dart out of the kitchen avoiding anywhere Ken was. That has stopped.

We are working on simple obedience and 'tricks'. It is hard because the natural progression is to have a dog come, sit, and then down - or - come, sit, shake paws. Toby still will not sit.

BUT - I noticed something that needs to be looked at. The only time I ever see Toby in a sit position is sometimes he wakes up and eases up into a sit. He looks awkward because his front legs are very close to his body and he doesn't adjust to get more balance. More importantly, I noticed that when he lays down, he swings his whole hip and legs to the side and lowers his body that way. This is exactly what our old girl 'Crabby Abbey' would have to do in order to lay down because of two severe cases of luxating patellas. We took her in, at 5 years of age, as a foster, to go through her two knee surgeries and she stayed with us. The surgery relieved the pain, but the scar tissue and perhaps years of just favoring her knees, she still did the same hoisting of her hips to lay down. She could never sit - and depended greatly on her front legs to do so much. Pain can make dogs crabby (hence her nickname). Like Toby, she did not want anyone - doing anything with her front paws. She was with us to the age of 14 and we adjusted to it for her.

Toby now eats his meals in the kitchen, by the door to the patio and is going in and out there with more ease. Perhaps the Prozac is starting to work. There is just a more general calm about him and less lowering of his tail and/or backing off. It was a good week for more walks around the neighborhood which he seems to like more. I'm slowly adding more distance and more new streets to the routine to build up his confidence and muscles. I worry about his knees, but want to do it to build his confidence. In the backyard I continue to try to get him to engage in direct play. He doesn't know how to fetch when I throw a ball for him, but will still burst into short tuckbuttruns. I did catch him playing with some toys inside which was great to see.

Friday, March 5th

This week we have worked on using treats to go in and out the door, which Toby looks forward to. I've used Xanax a couple evenings when Ken comes home, but it isn't as effective as me giving out 'high value' treats when standing near Ken. With this I can initiate Toby being near Ken to get attention and slowly move away - with Toby staying and enjoying it. His tail will remain relaxed and not tuck under. I also did this with Robin, who is at our home every week and Toby is responding very well. It's almost as if I give him the reinforcement that being near Robin is okay (and rewarding) he's game.

It seems that after our meeting on Monday with Dr. DePorter and Ken in the room, Toby may have decided that Ken was part of his circle of 'safe people' when faced with strangers in a strange situation.

Over the weekend I'm going to have Ken try the door exercise and see if that makes any difference. Also, I am going to figure out a way to have fresh treats upstairs in our bedroom. There is a glimmer of hope, but we still need work on his being comfortable with Ken and I going in and out with the morning routine.

This morning I walked back into our bedroom, after our morning routine of Toby jumping up for his 'good snuggles' and then his laying down for a rest after eating his breakfast. I expected to see Toby asleep next to the bed...instead, there he was standing with his front paws on the bed with his head on my pillow doing his good snuggle!!! He must have been devising a plan to steal the pillow or lost in thought because he did not hear me.

Also, I ordered the DAP spray and it should arrive today. I'm going to try it in the car just sitting with him and giving some of our high value treats.

Monday, March 1st

We had a check-up appointment with Dr. DePorter this morning and many things were clarified for us and I was given very specific training to work on with Toby.

I went shopping to buy some 'high value' reward treats for Toby so both Ken and I can have them available while we work with Toby.

The weather was beautiful so I took both Buddy and Toby for a walk. It was uneventful as we didn't run into anyone. When we got back home, I took both outside to play in the yard. Buddy played fetch while Toby watched and sniffed around. I finally found a large ball that Toby could see clearly and tossed it for him. He would run towards the ball but keep going in a wild tuckbuttrun around the yard. He did this several times and seemed to be completely happy with the exercise - not going after the ball.

Later we tried the treats conditioning at the door, going in and out. Toby did quite well with this and followed me around for a while after looking for more treats. I also fed him at the kitchen door and he ate at a normal rate without a care.

Generally, the dinner time with Ken home went okay. About an hour before I expected Ken home, I gave Toby some Xanax. Toby was with us the whole time and didn't show much stress. Then, after dinner something changed. Toby and Buddy went outside, but when it was time to come in, Toby stalled at the door to listened to the melting snow hitting the eaves above. He did not want to come in the door at all, which was a first for me. I immediately grabbed some treats which he stretched and took from me. When he balked, I stopped for a minute. Then I got down to his level, held out the treat again and he came right to me. It was odd, but then again, the pinging noise was new to him. (It makes me wonder if he was left in a crate for a long time and not exposed to 'normal' living).

The evening ended on a high note. Ken came into my computer/studio and sat down to talk. Normally Toby would move closer to me. This evening, Toby, with a relaxed tail, walked over to Ken for some ear scratches! It was a pleasant surprise for both of us.

Saturday, February 27th

We have a follow up appointment on Monday and Ken is going with us. Since putting the new collar on Toby, he has moments when he least afraid of Ken. He will now be in the kitchen with us and willing takes treats from Ken.

Yesterday when Ken came home, I did my 'Daddy's Home' routine, which Buddy loves and Toby with his tail wagging joined in!!! He went up to Ken at the door, instead of running to his room, and allowed Ken to pet him. At dinner he and the other dogs milled around, waiting for us to finish. Ken gave each of them a treat and Toby was right in the bunch.

One reason I'm having Ken go to the appointment is for coaching on how he should interact with Toby when it's not centered around the kitchen and treats. For example, when we're upstairs he will sometimes let Ken near him and others walk out of the room. This morning was a good morning and Ken was able to pet him.

I did ask Ken to be more verbal with Toby when he was around. I feel it might make Toby uncomfortable when Ken is around, walking into a room to talk to me, but not communicating with Toby. That has seemed to make a difference. It's baby steps of bonding.

A new thing Toby is starting to do is come up to me and nudge me to get my attention and then running to the door to let me know he wants to go out.

Also, I noticed that Toby is becoming more verbal. He will bark when someone new comes into our home along with Buddy - like an announcement - and - more 'comfort talk'. By that I mean moaning and groaning when he stretches, moaning and groaning when he gets his head and ears scratched. As if he's saying ahhhhh, that feels good.

Thursday, February 25th

I put a new DAP collar on Toby on Tuesday. On Wednesday, he came in the door without question for Ken at breakfast time! His morning routine, which has been iffy throughout the last week, has improved, but the biggest improvement came after the new collar. It's either the Prozac kicking in - or the collar works very well when strongest.

Toby seems to have pretty much overcome his fear of going out the door, although he prefers the door in 'his' room. He continues to go to the door and look out (french door with windows) when he wants to go out.

Saturday, February 20th

Just a little note: I was sitting here watching Toby initiate play with Buddy. He was doing a little bitey face and then grabbing a toy and teasing Buddy. Then Toby went to the door to signal he wanted to go outside and both dashed out the door for more play and tuckbuttruns around the yard.

When he came back to the door, I opened it and he dashed in, ran in a circle and dashed out again. This was done several times as if he was teasing me!

Nice to see this animated play.

Friday, February 19th

Busy week. Toby is slowly gaining in most areas. The act of going out the door is now just a matter of fact. He's more relaxed on most of his walks, which have been with me. (Ken hurt his

neck and isn't able to)

Ken has continued to be more verbal with Toby and although it hasn't made a huge difference, it's starting to make some difference.

We have also agreed that in the morning, when Ken let's Toby out - instead of having me come down to call him in, let Toby come in when he's comfortable. That is working. Ken waits until Toby comes to the door and opens it. Toby is still eating his breakfast in the hallway outside of the kitchen which is where he's comfortable. He won't eat much some mornings, but it's a relief to see him eat at a normal speed and with his tail up.

We're planning a trip up north in three weeks and would like to take Toby and Buddy with us. It will be a big deal as it will be a big change for Toby. We'll have to see where his 'safe' place will be. It's a small cottage so space is limited, but it's a place we spend a lot of time at. We will use the Xanax as necessary. We do a lot of walking up there so we will keep him busy and exercised.

Noticed this week that Toby is not looking at the ceiling anymore and he's not as aware of the lights from the sun reflecting. Also, he isn't as reactive to loud noises if something falls or slams shut. He is very, very brave if Ken has some food. I've asked Ken to let Toby come to him for treats. Most times Toby will stand there and eat it, sometimes he'll run and take it to 'his' room. It's Ken's form of lure training. When Toby makes the effort, he gets what he wants and Toby is doing it at his own pace. I'm letting Ken be the person with treats - I try not to use them and generally use praise for his bravery.

Sunday, February 14th

Had a training epiphany after re-reading some of the handouts I received. Our 5 year old grandson spent the night with us so I made sure I was downstairs during feeding time for the dogs. Toby was okay being in the kitchen for breakfast because I was there and took a few bites of his food. After that he did not want anymore.

When my daughter and son-in-law came to pick up Noah, we were sitting at the kitchen table talking and Toby came in to join us. Actually, he never went to 'his' room while they were there. I'm not sure if he thought we were eating and was just looking for some kind of treat or not. Anyway, he was happily going from person to person, including Ken. Ken, as always was rubbing his ears. It's then that I realized that Ken needed to be giving Toby his own verbal cues or rewards for coming up to him and asked him to come up with something so Toby would have a verbal reference/praise sounding something to connect with. Ken did and Toby's tail started to wag. Throughout the morning, Ken has been practicing this and it's making a little difference with Toby, especially when Ken comes into 'his' room. Toby doesn't move to the corner, or to me. He will allow Ken to talk to me and will even go up to him to sniff with his tail up.

Going out the door without a mad dash is still going good. Although yesterday a jet went over the house while he was outside. He stopped, looked up at the sky and his tail went down. I was watching and opened the door for him. He didn't run in like a maniac, but the sound was definitely a concern.

Saturday, February 13th

A few interesting things we noticed today. If Ken is having a snack, Toby will stand next to him and even touch his leg with his nose and wait patiently to see if he's going to get something. But - as soon as the snack is put away - Toby takes off and keeps his distance.

Buddy is getting better at coming when we call. We believe this is because Toby's recall to come in is so good. Something good is rubbing off on Buddy.

We had time today to walk both dogs together. Normally if it's just Ken, Toby will walk off to Ken's left side. Because of the snow, the sidewalk space was limited and Toby was willing to walk along side Ken or in the lead with Buddy. He would look back at me occasionally, but seemed to be enjoying himself for the first time. We had to go in the street for a portion of the walk and we actually started to see Toby prance a bit.

There is a neighbor with a very aggressive Pit Bull that is always on high alert and pulls on his lead whenever he sees other dogs or cars go by. (The owner has had this dog since a puppy but refuses to work with it). We saw her coming up the street near the corner we were going to turn at and a few houses from where they live. Normally the owner will turn and go the other way, but today decided to pass by us. Of course, Mr. Pit Bull was barking and pulling which normally would make Toby freeze. Today he actually barked and got animated like a normal Airedale. Fortunately when I gave him the 'leave it' command, he settled down.

When we finish walks, it's always treat time. Toby took his treats along with Buddy in the kitchen and didn't run to his room as he would in the past.

Baby steps.

Thursday, February 11th

Toby is now on his Prozac everyday. Not sure if it means much, but he isn't eating as much as he was. The good news is, he eats at a normal pace. There is no gobbling of the food and his tail isn't tucked under. If Ken isn't home from work, he will easily come into the kitchen for dinner - if Ken is there, we move his bowl just into an adjacent hallway so he can't see Ken. But mornings are going okay. I think he's just accepting that Ken gives out breakfast and it's time to eat. But - he's only eating a little bit and doesn't seem to be so hungry.

Doors. Going out the door is now more normal for both Ken and I. Toby isn't doing the hold back and mad dash out. His recall is excellent - unlike most Airedales. Now he's even going out by himself. He goes to the door and stands there - looks at me - looks at the door. That's his signal. We'll have to work on getting him to bark. This is a big improvement.

Toby was warming up to my friend who does our floors. She is a dog savvy person and he seemed to like her. Well, that was until this week. On Tuesday I was at class and he did not want to come in for her as he has before. So I don't know why that has changed. She was here today for a while and he acted like he barely knew her!! He has been around her since he came to live with us. She'll go with the flow and does praise him for his 'bravery' and is ignoring him otherwise. Wonder what's up with this.

Sunday, February 7th

Toby starts tomorrow getting his Prozac once a day. He is still struggling with Ken. One day he'll go up to him and sniff - or go to get a treat while he's reading the paper - the next will opt to go lay in his room and ignore Ken. I'm not starting the Xanax when Ken comes home until the Prozac is a daily dose.

This past Thursday, I had a birthday dinner I needed to go to. Ken said Toby slept in his room while I was out. Buddy needed to go out and Toby got up and went with him. Normally when Buddy comes in, Toby will. But - and probably because I was gone, he would not. After about a half hour of Ken going to the door to see if he wanted in, he called me to let me know. I was ready to call it an evening when Ken called to say that Toby decided to come in.

We are still working at ignoring Toby when he acts unsure and praise him when he does something positive.

On Saturday, I had about 15 people at our home for a meeting. I gave Toby a Xanax as prescribed and he did quite well. Ventured out of his room to 'mingle' and sniff people. After

the meeting started, he just went and layed down in his room. I don't shut the gate and he lays in the doorway so he can see what is going on. It has been a hectic few days, so there isn't much to report. Mornings are going better for Ken - Toby comes right in to eat breakfast and Ken doesn't have to leave the door standing open and disappear!

I'm learning that changes are not cut in stone. But there are little 'bits' of progress.

Tuesday, February 2nd

This is a recap of the last few days.

Sunday, Jan 31. We had planned on having our children and grandchildren over after an event we were taking them to. Toby had his Prozac in the morning. When we arrived back home, we let Toby and Buddy out while everyone was arriving. It was clear after a few minutes that Toby was a bit overwhelmed by the 7 adults and three children - although they were all being fairly quiet and respecting Toby's distance. The grandchildren were asked to walk and use their 'inside' voices. At that point I gave Toby one Xanax. I knew the family would be here for about two hours so this was going to be a good test of how Toby would/could react. By the time we sat down to dinner, the Xanax had time to get into his system. It was nice to see him able to walk in the kitchen and 'nose' about the table and see who was with us. From then on, Toby did not run and hide in his room.

Mornings are still the same with one change. When Ken lets the dogs out first thing, Toby would hesitate to come back in. This morning, Toby came to the door, instead of sitting a few feet away waiting for Ken to open the door and walk away and let Ken know he wanted in. Ken did not have to walk away! He still runs upstairs to see me with great enthusiasm, but will calm down quickly when I ask for a 'good snuggle' - and his head goes down on my lap for ear scratches.

Today was third day for his Prozac. One small thing I have noticed is he has stopped looking at the ceiling like he's hearing something unusual.

We did a little more work on 'lure training'. Honing my skills.

Toby is also staying outside more - but just watches Buddy run after his ball. Not joining in yet.

Friday, January 29th

Toby had his Fluoxidine (Reconcile/Prozac) this morning. He will be getting it every other day for two weeks. The morning routine was more normal, with Toby coming upstairs with great energy, but he did settle down and again responded to 'good snuggle'.

I worked with him on 'lure training' which I have to master more. He did respond very well with it and does seem to enjoy engaging in because for the moment, it is new. Yesterday I brought home a new Mr. Squeaky toy for Buddy. (He and Toby disemboweled his other ones) That meant a couple of hours of Buddy running around the house, squeak, squeaking his toy. Early this morning I found Toby with it between his paws and seemingly teasing Buddy by not letting him near it. That's new.

In the new column this morning, Toby followed me to the stairs, but did not find the need to follow me up them just to be where I was. He also went outside by himself and wandered a bit on his own - and he was the one who wanted to go out - and he was not seemingly afraid of the door. Go figure. This is a single door that leads from my computer/studio to the patio. He is more afraid of the doors that go from our kitchen to the patio. I'll have to figure that one out.

Maybe it's because this is HIS room also. He sleeps here and finds refuge here.

A New Journey for Toby

Yesterday I took Toby, our newest adopted Airedale, to visit with Dr. DePorter, a Behaviorist at OVRS. In just a little over two hours, I was enlightened and educated on how to help Toby with his dog anxiety. My mind was jammed with facts, guidance, information and direction on how we, Ken and I, were going to help Toby overcome his fears and anxiety from his past and transform him into, well, a typical Airedale. It's in him. There are glimpses of the Airedale for brief moments and it's all welcome - for better or for worse.

During our visit Toby was fitted with a D.A.P. collar. This is a collar that emits dog pleasing pheremones (synthetic) and works with the dog's body heat. In a nutshell, the hormones are based on the same ones a mother dog emits while she is nursing her pups which has a comforting and reassuring effect on the pups. I have never heard of this kind of collar before, but if Dr. DePorter was recommending it - I was going to use it.

The rest of my day was spent reading, filling in a calendar with medication info and digesting everything I was presented with. Toby will be on Prozac for a few months and Xanax if/when needed. What we need to learn and cut in stone is to basically ignore his fear behavior (unless he is very stressed) and Praise and Reward Bravery! That sounds so simple but is very, very important and makes so much sense.

There are specific fears we are working on with Toby which are: Fear of Ken and men in general, going outside through open doors, loud noises and reflecting lights. Most of the training we are going to be doing will give him general self esteem and will spill over into other areas where he's having small problems.

While so much was fresh in my mind, I greeted Ken at the door, just as I do every evening with Buddy and gave him some small kibble to toss to Toby to entice him to join us. That worked a little bit and will be something we'll continue to work on. I did the same thing while Ken was sitting at the table reading the paper. I instructed him to toss kibble to Toby and slowly make each land closer to him, Ken. Being an opportunist, Toby did approach Ken and ended up willingly accepting the treats and a pat on the head - which of course, was reinforced by Buddy joining in

Now - here's the kicker. This morning, as usual, Toby came upstairs to see me after eating his breakfast. His normal is bounding up the stairs, charging into our room and standing on his hind legs at the side of his bed with his paws flailing and acting like a crazy Airedale. I have to watch his paws because they are big and they can hurt and usually end up asking him to get off in order to calm him down. You'd think he hadn't seen me in days! This morning he came up the stairs, one at a time, pranced into our room, put his paws on the side of the bed and just wagged his tail. There was no flailing, no aire-pawing, no-I-want-to-jump-on-the-bed-and-be-whirling-dervish. I gave him a pat on his head and started rubbing his ears. Within minutes he laid his head down, on it's side, on my lap. I joking told him that was a good snuggle. I asked him to get down and he did and just laid on the floor. After a few minutes, I asked him to jump up again, which he did and we repeated the ears rubs, his head went down and I said again, 'good snuggle'. The third time I tried the this I just asked him to jump us and said do a 'good snuggle' and he put his head down. Could he have been that calm from the D.A.P. collar to learn this? A few minutes later Ken walked in. At that point I would have expected Toby to bolt and head for the hallway. It didn't happen. Toby just laid in his spot and accepted Ken in the room. Toby even got up to watch Ken doing his exercises from a distance, while wagging his tail. I was dumbfounded, so I decided to see if Toby would do 'good snuggle' for Ken - and he did! Maybe we were having a good morning - maybe the collar does make a difference. We'll have to watch for more changes and see what Dr. DePorter has to say.